Sunday, September 25, 2011

...stepping away...

This community has been hit with so much over the last couple of weeks. I was truly hoping for the chance to get more involved, and do anything I could to maintain our sweet little corner of the blog world.

I am so sad to say that, after much consideration, I've decided to step away for awhile. In the last week, I've witnessed the most intensely harsh words and criticisms that I had no idea even existed in this community. This bitterness was not conveyed through my blog, but through others I've read.

The reason I loved being a part of this blogging community was because of the sense of partnership and sisterhood that I felt with all you women. Unfortunately, those moments of partnership seem so difficult to find through the pages and pages of angry bitter words towards one another.

I have decided to step away from the Reader Outfits: What We Wear feature. I had so looked forward to doing this, as a chance to keep alive a feature that all of us loved. Many great women have submitted, saying they were so glad that Liz and I had decided to keep the feature going. With all the hurtful and negative feelings conveyed in anger over our doing this feature, I now want no part in it.

Liz, I wish you the very best in continuing this feature. It seems so clear that women love and miss this feature and were excited about this continuation. A very painful thread on Roxy's blog brought about many many negative words. Such bitter rants. Roxy had said she was planning on doing Reader Outfits as well, and I think that's wonderful too. You have such a loyal following of people that would all love to take part.

A woman's blog is her blog. Their part of the online world that lets her share whatever their her heart desires. Be true to what you want to write. Things you find most interesting, pictures and details.

Who are we to criticize these people? We have such a strong potential to, instead, become close with them.

The last several weeks deeply saddens me. I truly thought we would all get the chance to pull back up and be stronger than ever. In the process, it has become ever so cool, ever so cruel. Ever so difficult to continue to be around the constant negativity.

So this will be it for awhile. Not sure if I'll be pulling it down completely, or just taking a much needed breather. I am so hoping that everyone will have calmed down in the not so distant future. That each and every one of us can be a better part of this community... aiming always to build it up, and never to break each other down.


*** Update...

Hey ladies. Thank you so much for all of the sweet positive messages in response to my last post.
I just wanted to make it clear (not sure if I didn't in this post) that I need a break not because I feel as if I'm being personally attacked and torn down. It is the way I'm seeing others being treated that seriously bothers me. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. My opinion is simply... if you don't like something, don't read it.
It just makes me so sad to see the way ladies are completely tearing apart other bloggers in general.
Thanks so much for the support. Please continue to support each other!


  1. Wow Kim I'm so sorry to hear this news. I haven't been on the internet much this week, so I had no idea any of this was going on. I wondered why I didn't see the "What We Wear" post. I hope that you get the break that you need and that you reconsider taking down your blog.

  2. I'm really sorry as well. I just recently discovered your blog, and really enjoyed reading your posts, especially about your wedding and honeymoon! I just got married myself, not quite two months ago. I've been very upset over the whole scandal, for those that were directly affected and lost money, and for people like myself, who couldn't shake the nasty feeling in the pit of our stomachs. It was hard to realize that the person I thought I knew, I didn't. But it was she that was deceitful, and I've accepted that I did nothing wrong, except be a bit too trusting. But that's who I am, and I'm ok with that. I've made some great friendships with other women who blog, and my life is richer for it. I'm happy that I was, and am, open to that. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. This whole situation left me sad and angry, but not closed off. I don't think I can ever trust Kim again, or want to be associated with her in any way, but nor do I wish her malice. I hope she finds the help that she needs, and truly makes amends with those that she deceived. I still love reading the blogs that I follow, but you are right, there is a major disconnect right now. I don't know that it'll ever get back to where it once was, but I hope so. You need to do what is best for you, I wish you nothing but good things. Hopefully one day you will feel up for sharing with us again.

  3. I am so sorry you are hurt. I did not follow her blog. Just lost interest more than a year ago, but was happy someone was going to do Reader Outfits, as I enjoy the styling ideas. I hope this does not change your opinion of everyone.

  4. So sorry to hear this Kim! I was shocked to see the backlash on Roxy's blog about you guys taking this's sad really that grown women are so mean to each other. I love the Reader Outfits feature and welcome seeing anyone coordinate it. Hope you know you are always a welcome site in the Anthro world in my book!

  5. I'm so sad to hear that you will not be blogging for awhile! I will miss your posts and the outfits you share with us, I hope you decide to come back soon!

  6. I actually just found your blog through Roxy's blog and that hateful thread. I'm sorry that had to happen and that it led you to take a break. Girls are so catty!!!!!! Ugh.

  7. I knew this was coming- when I read you guys were going to do Reader Outfits, I JUST knew someone would say something negative. Like they have a freaking patent on it. Absolutely RIDICULOUS!! Take care :)

  8. Kim - I have followed you for a long time and this news is very disappointing to me. Don't let these mean girls change what you want to do. You have a loving husband and just getting started with your beautiful life together. Don't let harsh words change something you were looking forward to do. Honestly, I say screw them. Unfortunately, girls are catty and very jealous. This is just the way it is. Don't let them bring you down. I saw the comments you are referring to. This blog that I seen the comments posted at is not what I call a positive blog. That blog owner has issues with Behind the Dressing Room Door - which likely had a reason to do with the negative comments from her followers. You do not want followers like that anyways. Many other followers, including myself, were very much looking forward to seeing your spin on this feature. I ask you to please reconsider your decision. Please do not let these dramatic snarky girls take you away from something you loved so much. I know you are a strong girl and started this feature with a good heart. So be that strong girl and don't let the bullies bring you down. Don't let them have that much power over the Anthro community.

    I have started a blog - I also touched on this subject in my post.

  9. Take your time and please come back when you're ready. You'll be missed in bloggyland.
    I haven't seen the thread myself, but I'm not sure why people would choose to be hurtful to someone who they don't know and who has done nothing to them - please stay strong and stay happy.

  10. I really hope you don't take the hateful comments from Roxy's blog to heart. She had mentioned wanting to do the reader's outfit feature, but why should she have more claim over it than you??
    I say more power to you and Liz!! I hate to see "bully bloggers" have power over you!

  11. Hi Kim,

    I saw the comments on EA and I just felt terrible that you got caught in the middle of this never-ending issue between Roxy and Liz. I really enjoy your blog, and I would hate to see you let the nastiness that has shown itself in this community recently make you stop doing something you enjoy. If you guys want to do reader outfits, do it. The internet is big enough for everyone. Take all the time away you need, but I hope to see your smiling face back here very soon!

  12. Oh, Kim! Don't leave us!

    And to think that I just discovered you a mere few weeks ago. My fave post of yours is the Anthro personal shopper one, where you try on a zillion outfits AND you took pictures for us! I absolutely adore that post :)

    Take some time to breath and get your footing back. Anthroholic-gate really brought the fangs out in some people, and a few seemed to direct anger at gals completely unrelated to Anthroholic. (It's much easier to be a bully when you're online and anonymous.)

    Miss you already! I hope you won't be long :)

  13. And the bully blogger (and her bullying posse) strikes again! Please don't allow someone to shut you down. As another commenter said, the internet is big enough for everyone, not just the popular crowd.

  14. I've never commented on your blog before but feel compelled to now. Yours, pretty things and behind the dressing room door are the only ones I visit now because I never see the high school behavior there. I had no idea, until I read EA, that there was such cattiness going on. I even got a bad email from a community leader when I mentioned Liz's blog. I had no idea there was any issues there!!! Of course, once I found out what the 'issues' were, I realized what sort of mentality I was dealing with. The issues were very silly and young. But once I realized that I decided this community is not the place for me. Anthroholic seems to be the tip of the iceberg in terms of the ugliness going on. I have found some other blogs that are purely fashion an are very much above trashing others to get ahead. Good for you- you are too good for all that is going on.

  15. Hello. I've never posted on here before and had to create a blog account just to post here(although I don't intend to keep my own blog).

    Anyway, I always enjoy looking at reviews and outfit pictures by other girls in the community. I hope you come back since I find your reviews helpful because my build is similar to yours. I'm 5'8" and size 0/25/XS too. Also blonde with fair skin!

    The Shifting Buttons skirt I saw on you a while back, I hope I can find that someday! It looked great on you and I know it would look great on me too. I wish I had tried it back when it was available.

    Did you end up purchasing those Pilcro Superscript Cords? They looked really great on you. When they went on sale I actually got all of the colours because I do find it hard to find pants that fit that well. A lot are too big in the waist. Plus the extra 25% off the sale it was just worth it. :) I got the size 2 though actually simply because I didn't want them to be super super tight and perhaps make me look a little too I sized up to the 2 which still fit snugly, just not super snugly. Not sure how much they'll stretch out with wear though.

    Anyway, yeah I didn't like the attacks I saw some people launching around either. :( It was just a bad time for the community and well, people aren't perfect. Most of the time people in the community are friendly to each other but the odd time a negative side does show itself, just like how in families there is always the odd argument that happens. So I think we can probably forgive the fact that it happened and hopefully we can all learn from the experience and therefore hopefully it won't happen again. I didn't take part in the negative posts myself. I really didn't like it either, but I know it's a part of human nature that sometimes comes out. I think the same thing could potentially happen to any blog community, to be honest.

  16. Also I'll note that I would also really like for something like reader outfits to happen again. It was very nice to see all kinds of different women of different ages and sizes(which would also help people reference what would look good on themselves too when they looked at the pictures). I thought it was one of the nicest things and very connecting for people in the community.

  17. I´m so sorry... :(